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Rae of Darkness
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Rae of Darkness
BACKSTORY:
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 ] Kicking off Halloween week with a parody of the original commercial for the Zartan figure. I took the liberty of swapping in Roadblock and Duke, and adding a bit of skepticism on Duke's part. The original commercial has the "disguised" Zartan claiming, "I don't know any Zartan!" and making his slow getaway while hauling away his partially disassembled getaway vehicle on a crate with skis. It ends right there, and based on the claim in the first line of Zartan being an evil master of disguise, he has obviously fooled GI Joe and made a clean getaway. Why would they bother detaining some swamp-dwelling, bearded civilian and asking him such things as:- To show some ID
- What his business is in the area
- What's in the crate
- Why he's sporting the fashion of a mercenary, evil master of disguise known to be working in the area for a terrorist organization?
- Is that a gun you've got there? (In a later version, he features not only a palette swap of a SAW Viper's clothes, but the Squad Automatic Weapon to go with it! Beards don't go too far towards excusing someone hauling that kind of hardware around. Don't ask how I know.)
] No, this man clearly has a beard! Everyone knows Zartan doesn't have a beard!
] Much has been said about GI Joe's leniency on uniform regulations already. Suffice to say that Roadblock's camo pattern doesn't match any recognized official camo pattern I've ever seen. It looks to me like a seemingly random symmetrical design. I couldn't really come up with anything I felt looked right (or find a good image large enough and well-lit enough to cut and paste), until I thought it reminded me a little of The Mesa Field from Atari's 1982 game, "Raiders of the Lost Ark. Once I stole figured that out, it was a snap.
] Anyway, I most likely wouldn't have chosen this year's theme if it wasn't the 25th anniversary of G.I. Joe's 3¾-inch action figures. The new figures feature completely new sculpts with advanced articulation and superior detail. Many of the knives and sidearms which were originally molded to the figure are now removable accessories. None of this is news to any toy nerds who have been paying the remotest bit of attention, since they have been "available" (in limited quantities) since July.
] I've already mentioned elsewhere how much I like the new figures and sets, but perhaps the greatest part of the new line is that now for the first time in over twenty years, I have a complete Zartan. I lost that tiny little mask the original figure came with almost immediately. The new mask isn't too different from the original, except the eyes are painted and it sports a goatee now instead of a full beard. The figure comes single-carded; the Chameleon in the picture is from the original release, and thus, sold separately (on eBay).
-Rob |
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